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题目:
The cheap air flight gives people more choices of traveling, while the problems caused by this transportation should also be considered.
Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.
Along with the advances of society, an accumulating number of controversies have been bought to our attention, one of which is the cheap air flight.(开头段太套了,最多不会超过5.5分). Quite a few people view that the inexpensive flight enhances the choices(改为efficiency and convenience更具体) of traveling. Nevertheless towards the same issue, many others point out that we are supposed to take the problems caused by this way(改称its problems更简洁) into consideration. (Both sides of the arguments have very strong feelings and reasons.)这句话可以不写,太呆板了,建议你看几篇考官范文的开头段,找找感觉。
改版后开头段:
The advances of society give rise to an accumulating number of controversies, one of which the cheap air flight. Conflicting with the problems it has caused, quite a few people view that the inexpensive flight enhance efficiency and convenience of traveling.
There are several reasons which(啰嗦删掉) suggest that the cheap air flight is of great value for visitors traveling. To start with, it could exert conductive impact on economic thrift(加of an individual具体一些). That is to say, the prices of airplane tickets could be affordable for an increasing number of tourists who may have a sp...